I Have

I'm not sure if this is even healthy. But, I will still doing it since I consider it is a gift.

I've been losing myself for certain time. And when I do realize it, I will hold for as long as I could to still moving within the line; being normal. Stay safe.

I guess.

And from there, whenever I keep trying to embrace the moment where I able to regain myself, considering what I've been through, or perhaps the war that I was in and still am within me and my personality; I think, this is where it came from.

From the non stop nonsense and silent talking.

From all the deep breath taken to not losing temper or dissappointment.

From all the worries that beyond my capability to take care of.

From all the no-one-ever-understand.

So.

I'm gifted.

And proud.

That I have—

The ability to freeze.

To shut down.

And switch off.

For as long as I want.

For as long as I need.