You have to give time, sometimes. Well, in my case, the longer I wait, the harder it will be.
"Just take a leave,"
I did it.
"The appointment will be at 3. He will wait,"
Time getting faster and faster that I wish I could just stop! Me heart beating so damn uncontrollable. Every single second count.
"What's your final decision?"
Take a deep breath.
"I'm sorry... I'm leaving,"
"Okay, if that's what you want plus you already met Prof. D. So, I take you already make up your mind,"
"No. They ask me to stay... it just.."
"I'm not happy,"
He stared at me.
"I asked you and you told me everything is okay,"
"It was okay,"
"Sometimes... you have to lie, don't you?"
"Can I trust you?"
"Why you can't?"
"I don't know. I'm afraid maybe. I think I can bear with it. I think it just a part of normal process to be a new person. I think I'll have the courage someday until I realize.. I just... can't,"
"Your new place can't promise you the same thing wont happen,"
"Yes it can't, but it might not which it already happened here..."
"Just wait another 6 months, we will take the action,"
"2 months. Just wait two months,"
"I can't. I just can't and I will probably lose the one that I have in hand,"
"You can apply for it,"
"Dr., I will come, someday, maybe. Who knows? I don't and you don't know either,"
"Our door always open for you,"
"You still have time to change your mind,"
"My mind is so stubborn right now,"